My mind is in a whirl and I have so many things to talk about but I don't know where should I start. =(
Did I said anything wrong in my previous entry?? sigh.. I hope I did not! but what I wrote on my previous entry and ALL my entry comes from my sincere heart and yesterday's entry was what I felt and it has been kept in me for the past few months.
I have been very patient to people who has been gossiping about me, being sarcastic to me and even their bluntness to me. I mean very patient!! Especially to those who keeps gossiping about how I behave,how I walk, how I talk and my gestures.. I have gone thru this hell for million times and I got used to it when people gossips about me..how sissy I am?!! But when I said I'm used to it, it doesn't mean that I don't feel hurt at all. You people know that human beings have feelings...they laughed,cry,angry etc.
Yes???!! So,why do people still carry on gossiping?!! I'm not saying that I never gossip but it has to be controlled! Don't go too far until you really hurt their feelings.. I just don't know and don't understand why they LOVE gossiping about me? Have I done anything wrong to them?Or have I hurt or offend them before?
For instance,my "past-tense" friend wrote me a testimonial. I'm stll unsure if I still regard her as my friend or she stills regard me as her friend but let me write down what she wrote for me.. It happens a few months ago. I accepted her testimonial and my bro told me that I was stupid to accept her testimonial.. then,I know that I was so dumb!!(its taking so bloody long to open the page!!)
After long praises for me(which I really really appreciated)comes the climax.
Here it goes:
"one thing..dis guy walks, the butt a bit u noe..sway to the sideways lyk gerl lyk tat..haha.." (no editing is done..100% copy & paste!)
Ok,this part is where my blood starts to boil! It really pissed me off! I mean after the long and sweet praises,she has to say this. What the FUCK!! If you regard me as your friend,why must you say this to me..I felt offended and hurt when you said that. I mean you can talk about some negative points about me,but don't you think that you have gone too far?? You hurt me! TERRIBLY! And I was such a fool to accept that bloody fucking testimonial of hers! AARRRGGGHHHH!!!
My life isn't so perfect as you all will know by now! I may put a smile,laughed like nobody's bussiness but deep inside me, that feeling of hurt is till there! It never ever gone!!
I'm still curious!! Why does anyone like to gossip???? I know some people hate me. Sometimes, I may look rude and proud.. I don't deny that! When I don't know you,I will never smile and will tend to look away('cause I'm a timid boy from young and will always be) but when I'm with my friends,I'm different! I'm so talkative and loud!
My sis has asked me to do something about it! I mean I have been VERY patient and I don't take actions or I will just, "Aiyah!Heck lah". I will have this in mind and I will forgive and forget but things are now getting more complicated and has gone beyond it!!!
I know that I have to do something about it but........ sigh! I don't know how to put it in words!
Ok,if you're wondering why do I always talk about my sisters and brother in this entry 'cause they are truly my friend and siblings. I never knew that they were there for me all the while and all I do is that I don't bother and I neglected them. Until one day when she "wake" me up and I truly realised that they were the one who's be with me and walking alongside with me all these while!! I've known them since Sec1..the first day of school but we weren't close at that time until last year where we were so closed we called ourselves 'Brothers and Sisters'. I have 3 sisters and 1 brother. they have been supporting me...I'm glad and happy.(I will not reveal their names!Its for me to know and for you to find out!!)
Since I'm talking about FRIENDS. Let me go on a little bit further! Define for me FRIENDS. If you asked me,I will definately give you an honest answer!
1. A friend is someone who truly and sincerely cares for me.
2.A friend take cares of my feelings in my heart.
3.A friend understands me.
4.A friend knows all about me.
5.A friend is someone who will always be there for me when I need them.
6.A friend guides me to the correct path.
7.A friend is someone whom I can trust on.
8.A friend is someone whom I can depend on.
9.A friend is there when I need a shoulder to lie on.
10.A friend is someone who cares for me.
11.A friend is someone who LOVES me sincerely.
12.A friend is someone who misses me every second and minute.
13.A friend never gossips about thier own friend(very important!).
14.A friend protects you from any harm.
15.A friend is someone who walks alongside with you.
I think thats enough..Fifteen definations about FRIENDS! I guess I could list more but its getting late.
Hmm,so you see! The fantastic 4 who has always been there for me and all of the above are none other than my own Brother and Sisters! Love you guys!!!!! They are always there for me whenever I need them but I guess I had misunderstood them and neglected them but inside my heart you guys are the fantastic 4.... =) Thanks a million!!! And I promise you that I will also be there for you guys when you need me!
OK..... My hands are getting numb and I guess I have spilled a quater of what is in my heart and I feel slightly better.... Thanks for reading this entry...Give me feedbacks.. I need to know from you guys what you think and so on...
till I blog again.....
*COOL!*
*C. DOUBLE O. L*(get it?)
*C.O.O.L*
(haha...My maths teacher did this to me when I saw him while I was on my home..It was humourous..lol...Especially the cool part!! hahahahahahaha ;p)
Written on: Thursday, July 07, 2005 Time: 6:37 pm
sigh...
My mind is in a whirl and I have so many things to talk about but I don't know where should I start. =(
Did I said anything wrong in my previous entry?? sigh.. I hope I did not! but what I wrote on my previous entry and ALL my entry comes from my sincere heart and yesterday's entry was what I felt and it has been kept in me for the past few months.
I have been very patient to people who has been gossiping about me, being sarcastic to me and even their bluntness to me. I mean very patient!! Especially to those who keeps gossiping about how I behave,how I walk, how I talk and my gestures.. I have gone thru this hell for million times and I got used to it when people gossips about me..how sissy I am?!! But when I said I'm used to it, it doesn't mean that I don't feel hurt at all. You people know that human beings have feelings...they laughed,cry,angry etc.
Yes???!! So,why do people still carry on gossiping?!! I'm not saying that I never gossip but it has to be controlled! Don't go too far until you really hurt their feelings.. I just don't know and don't understand why they LOVE gossiping about me? Have I done anything wrong to them?Or have I hurt or offend them before?
For instance,my "past-tense" friend wrote me a testimonial. I'm stll unsure if I still regard her as my friend or she stills regard me as her friend but let me write down what she wrote for me.. It happens a few months ago. I accepted her testimonial and my bro told me that I was stupid to accept her testimonial.. then,I know that I was so dumb!!(its taking so bloody long to open the page!!)
After long praises for me(which I really really appreciated)comes the climax.
Here it goes:
"one thing..dis guy walks, the butt a bit u noe..sway to the sideways lyk gerl lyk tat..haha.." (no editing is done..100% copy & paste!)
Ok,this part is where my blood starts to boil! It really pissed me off! I mean after the long and sweet praises,she has to say this. What the FUCK!! If you regard me as your friend,why must you say this to me..I felt offended and hurt when you said that. I mean you can talk about some negative points about me,but don't you think that you have gone too far?? You hurt me! TERRIBLY! And I was such a fool to accept that bloody fucking testimonial of hers! AARRRGGGHHHH!!!
My life isn't so perfect as you all will know by now! I may put a smile,laughed like nobody's bussiness but deep inside me, that feeling of hurt is till there! It never ever gone!!
I'm still curious!! Why does anyone like to gossip???? I know some people hate me. Sometimes, I may look rude and proud.. I don't deny that! When I don't know you,I will never smile and will tend to look away('cause I'm a timid boy from young and will always be) but when I'm with my friends,I'm different! I'm so talkative and loud!
My sis has asked me to do something about it! I mean I have been VERY patient and I don't take actions or I will just, "Aiyah!Heck lah". I will have this in mind and I will forgive and forget but things are now getting more complicated and has gone beyond it!!!
I know that I have to do something about it but........ sigh! I don't know how to put it in words!
Ok,if you're wondering why do I always talk about my sisters and brother in this entry 'cause they are truly my friend and siblings. I never knew that they were there for me all the while and all I do is that I don't bother and I neglected them. Until one day when she "wake" me up and I truly realised that they were the one who's be with me and walking alongside with me all these while!! I've known them since Sec1..the first day of school but we weren't close at that time until last year where we were so closed we called ourselves 'Brothers and Sisters'. I have 3 sisters and 1 brother. they have been supporting me...I'm glad and happy.(I will not reveal their names!Its for me to know and for you to find out!!)
Since I'm talking about FRIENDS. Let me go on a little bit further! Define for me FRIENDS. If you asked me,I will definately give you an honest answer!
1. A friend is someone who truly and sincerely cares for me.
2.A friend take cares of my feelings in my heart.
3.A friend understands me.
4.A friend knows all about me.
5.A friend is someone who will always be there for me when I need them.
6.A friend guides me to the correct path.
7.A friend is someone whom I can trust on.
8.A friend is someone whom I can depend on.
9.A friend is there when I need a shoulder to lie on.
10.A friend is someone who cares for me.
11.A friend is someone who LOVES me sincerely.
12.A friend is someone who misses me every second and minute.
13.A friend never gossips about thier own friend(very important!).
14.A friend protects you from any harm.
15.A friend is someone who walks alongside with you.
I think thats enough..Fifteen definations about FRIENDS! I guess I could list more but its getting late.
Hmm,so you see! The fantastic 4 who has always been there for me and all of the above are none other than my own Brother and Sisters! Love you guys!!!!! They are always there for me whenever I need them but I guess I had misunderstood them and neglected them but inside my heart you guys are the fantastic 4.... =) Thanks a million!!! And I promise you that I will also be there for you guys when you need me!
OK..... My hands are getting numb and I guess I have spilled a quater of what is in my heart and I feel slightly better.... Thanks for reading this entry...Give me feedbacks.. I need to know from you guys what you think and so on...
till I blog again.....
*COOL!*
*C. DOUBLE O. L*(get it?)
*C.O.O.L*
(haha...My maths teacher did this to me when I saw him while I was on my home..It was humourous..lol...Especially the cool part!! hahahahahahaha ;p)
